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      <span class="title" itemprop="headline">杜撰</span>
      <p class="time article" itemprop="datePublished" datetime="2013-10-28T12:34:24+08:00">October 28, 2013｜<span>瀏覽人數  2,743 次</span></p>
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        <p><iframe width="560" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/vkpofguujbs?list=PL79E7DFB543C76883" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>我在猜家有嬰兒或寵物的人通常都會很希望他們能開口講話吧
<br />不然為什麼很多人都喜歡為幼兒或寵物發聲，在照片旁杜撰他們的心情對話呢
<br />簡單版的比如＂今天天氣好好哦，最喜歡馬麻帶我去公園玩了＂
<br />或是放一張孩子在喝奶的照片，旁邊標註＂我有用心喝ㄋㄟㄋㄟ，醬才會快快長大唷～＂
<br />複雜版的是幫小孩開一個自己的FB，除了上述的貼照片假講話外，在朋友有什麼問題時用小孩的口吻去留言＂馬麻說壞事總會過去的阿姨要加油哦＂
<br />明明你就是馬麻啊裝個屁啊！
<br />老實說這種事我不是很懂，可我在猜等我有了孩子後可能也會忍不住走上這條路吧
<br />因為真的很多媽媽們喜歡這一套啊。</p>

<p>想想如果是自己的孩子或寵物難免很想要賦予性格幫他們配個音
<br />有時也真的是因為照片的表情感覺在開心或是不耐煩或是氣嘟嘟，就算他們並沒有但看起來像
<br />這種渾然天成的戲感看到就忍不住想要加一個O.S.
<br />也算是一種可以被理解的事啦
<br />啊嗯勾如果各位最近有進市立動物園的FB，會發現工作人員是卯起來在幫圓仔做設計對白
<br />一開始是＂不要吵啦，人家愛睏＂這種簡單版
<br />後來變成影片配一個溫馨的音樂來個自我介紹版
<br />到現在則是走火入魔的杜撰了圓仔和圓圓的對話，變成一個母女在聊天的小劇場
<br />有天圓仔說媽媽的眼影好漂亮我簡直想腮牠巴掌，眼影是畫在眼皮上那種整圈的叫黑眼圈啊（咦這是重點嗎）
<br />然後圓圓還要介紹一些其它的動物給圓仔，但明明是想介紹給我們吧
<br />圓仔根本一輩子不可能逛動物圓的啊牠要認識馬來貘幹嘛
<br />有天還看到圓仔說想和長臂猿做朋友
<br />可那猿看起來超兇狠貌似不好惹
<br />為什麼要杜撰圓仔的心思呢牠哪有想到處交朋友啦！</p>

<p>但即使我再怎麼堵南杜撰之風也沒有消減的意思
<br />有天打開網頁我看到一段話是這樣的：「黃色小鴨表示，最愛就是高雄的風和日麗和熱情民眾，希望大家去看景點與美食」怎麼現在連黃色小鴨都有心思就是了
<br />而且還有表示二字港覺超嚴肅的是政府發言人吧
<br />圓仔起碼會滾會翻和媽媽有些互動是個活體有點情緒
<br />黃色小鴨明明是一個面無表情的塑膠製品也要幫它配音是怎樣啦（翻桌）。</p>

<p>後記：
<br />幫小鴨配O.S.就像幫維尼人偶配音一樣整個很怪
<br />主要是人偶沒表情
<br />就像open小將的朋友叫什麼來著？就灰灰的永遠在生氣那隻
<br />有時看到他的人偶很快樂的在跳舞我也覺得休誇怪怪因為他表情明明不開心
<br /><iframe width="560" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/dUAz75IIsCE" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>
<br />（你看，連同伴掉下台他都無感了超冷血的啊，冷血之人不適合狂舞吧）
<br />讓我想到921地震時哆啦A夢有來台灣（人的腦容量是有限的但看看我都記些什麼（戳自己太陽穴））
<br />他不是為此而來可能是早就排好宣傳行程，結果不小心發生大地震他留也不是走也可惜，於是就上電視多少曝光一下來了都來了唄
<br />結果主持人況明潔皺著眉（我對此事印象也太鮮明了）說了許多感傷遺憾但大家要加油的話
<br />旁邊的哆啦A夢君是笑得合不攏嘴非常不合時宜
<br />人偶就不是一個應該有情緒的東西黃色小鴨是要表示什麼啦（又怒了）</p>

<p>至於一直貼小孩照片我以前不能理解現在多少可以了因為我也會一直貼貝貝（羞）
<br />不過我對於那種還會寫＂大家等了很久吧寶包的新影片上了唷＂感到羞赧
<br />因為到底誰會吃飽橕著等別人的寶包等很久呢
<br />別人的孩子除非極端可愛不然很難會沒事特別期待吧
<br />小孩這種東西啊，真的是你跟他熟了才會特別喜愛呀（還是說我這人比較沒母性）
<br />不過我想父母都會著迷自己孩子吧，這種港覺我目前無法理解，說不準等我有了小孩也會醬發了瘋似的每天貼啊～</p>

<p>最後我覺得<a target="_blank" href="http://www.ettoday.net/news/20131023/285493.htm">這件事</a>太莫名其妙了
<br />既然動物圓花了那麼多錢養牠民眾也剛好喜歡看牠
<br />那消費一下牠會怎樣呢，哈雷和派翠克（好復古）剛來時也是一直被消費啊
<br />到現在有一隻好像默默的往生了都無人知曉
<br />至少牠們的人生曾經燦爛過
<br />等圓仔老了恐怕也沒什麼人要理了吧</p>
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